Kouda Tomohiro. Now that's an artist's work that I haven't seen translated in a long time.

Base +6

I volunteer to proofread for you if you'd like.

Page 6: You wrote Fellation, but it should be spelled Fellatio. I'm not good with translating japanese myself, but based on the context of the whole, I think she's alluding to how she learned how to give him a blowjob. So I think instead of " You carried a magazine that you buy in the convenience store" you could put " It was in one of the porn mags you bought." "You are about to cum just from this" Instead of "For this"

Page 7: I'm assuming she's still talking about his approaching climax, so " There's no helping it, huh. If you want to cum, then cum quickly." Then in the next bubble " Want to shoot it all over my breasts? On my face?" would make more sense. In the middle panel, I think you could make it "Any..." like he's stammering here instead of "hou".

Page 8: " This is also your first time... Lets leave those options for another time" Fully and yet need their missing letters, and " I have to do" would make more sense. And the last line " This should be enough" would work just as well.

Page 9: "I will do it without holding back" could also work

Page 10: I think "You're" would work better than "He's".

Page 11: Mabey a comma after "it" and "everything" would help the flow of her telling him to pour it all in.

Page 12: I think "Somehow" would work better than "Somewhat"

Page 13: all you need to do here is take the "An" and make it an "A".

Hope this helps you man.

Last edited on 14 March 2015, 11:14 UTC.

Base +3, harutoshi +12, gotee +6, bahamutjr +14, yukimerry +8, Fleegman +6

@mysteriousstranger3 thanks i already fix it with your corrections :D

Base +6, yukimerry +8, Fleegman +6