A very cute story by Digital Lover involving Kyousuke and Kuroneko.

Warning: this takes place at around volume 10 of the light novel (the first anime season stops at the end of volume 5), if you don't want to be spoiled, don't read it (I think it would be a shame not to read it though). If you've already read the previous Kuroneko doujin by this author, there aren't more spoilers in this one than in the previous one.

For those who are wondering about the last page, the lyrics are from "Sailor Fuku wo Nugasanaide", a song by "Onyanko Club" that dates back to 1985.

Translation: KirbyDances
Editing: Super Shanko

@kebab4you: Is my English really that bad? I mean, I know it's far from perfect, but I don't think I made any grammar or spelling mistake, and I don't think the wording's that awkward either (but since English isn't my mother tongue, I can't really tell)... So, can you please elaborate on this?
And I will use "lol" as long as the author uses "w" in Japanese. Trust me, reading "w" in Japanese is nearly as silly as reading "lol" in English (that is, if you think it sounds silly, which sounds reasonable to me).

@Erza Scarlet: okay, I get it. Now that you point it out, I remember I wasn't sure about it either when I wrote it. I must have read that somewhere and thought it was slang for "my house" (because I wouldn't have thought of it otherwise).

@Palaxius: thanks.

@Timel: I know it's annoying, but it's also seriously annoying to read "w" in Japanese. And I don't want to replace them by "haha" because if the author had wanted it to sound like "haha", she would have written "haha" rather than "w".

@mickey711: thanks for your help. Though I probably won't be making a v2 (I don't want to annoy the editor either), I'll try to keep that in mind for my future translations.

Base +15, RareTracks +15, altereggo +22, Jyasuten +8, T_Starrk +23, danixxx +34, clpmh +8, snowshoes +15, lasertym +20, Zenmetsu +15, AlexUnknown +8

Great Kyousuke and Kuroneko story. And using lol is absolutely fine. It's the same as w in Japanese.
Can't wait for season 2

Base +7, altereggo +22, RareTracks +15, T_Starrk +23, Rei-Tenshi +38, danixxx +34, lasertym +20, anaxagoras +6, AlexUnknown +8

Great story overall but as kebab4you pointed out 1 or 2 grammatical errors, to elaborate on the first page kyousuke says "why have you been coming at mine every day" that doesn't really make sense. Not too big a deal as you can still follow the story pretty easily.

Base +7, altereggo +22, RareTracks +15, T_Starrk +23, Rei-Tenshi +38, danixxx +34, AlexUnknown +8

Just because you've never heard "coming at mine" it doesn't mean it does not exist.

EDIT: And it reads quite well too, I seriously don't get the "proofreader" thing, I'd rather have ten "lol" than a single "you're = your", just like the things pointed down here are nothing but nitpicking. Thanks KirbyDances, keep up the good work.

Base +20, synpyre +13, Agent09 +11, 1001010 +6, RareTracks -15, aloc1234 +23, clpmh +8, maipantsu +23, lasertym +20, anaxagoras +6

Good doujin, though using "lol" every 3 bubbles is annoying, adding a simple "haha" would have been better.
Waiting for season 2.

Base +2, NailB +19, Rei-Tenshi +38, danixxx +34

It was a sugary sweet story.

Base +17, lasertym +20, AlexUnknown +8

Thanks for the post. However, you should really consider getting a proof reader.

And never use "lol" in a text, it´s a silly thing to read.

Base +7, NailB +19, altereggo -22, Rei-Tenshi +38, Nepuuu -6, anaxagoras -6

I think it's a great translation and the dialogue flows quite well, but as others have pointed out, there are some grammatical mistakes here and there, as well as sentences that could be improved upon. Having a proofreader to look over your work is beneficial since they can spot mistakes you've missed or weren't looking for. And although it's been a good while since I've done this, and English isn't my first language either, I hope you find my suggestions to be helpful:

Page 2

Third panel: "Why have you been coming over to my place/house every day lately?", instead of "...coming at mine..."

It could also work if the sentence was phrased as an observation rather than an outright question: "You've been coming over to my house every single day lately", for example.

Sixth panel, first speech bubble: "...come over to my house", rather than "...come at my house...".

You could also opt to not use the prepositional verb "coming over" and instead just say "come to my house"

Page 3

First panel, first speech bubble: 'entrance exams' would be more concise than 'exams for university'. "Since I'm busy studying for my entrance exams..."

Page 7

Second panel, second speech bubble: "I was curious and bought it on a whim" might sound better. While he could've made an unconscious decision to purchase the lube, he noted that he was curious about the item, which implies he gave it some thought.

Base +9, Demosthenes +12, AlexUnknown +8

[Insert Kirino funny laugh]. This would be an adequate description of this.

Base +10

Love the D.L. Action series so this was an instant winner to me, though I must admit that all the 'LOLs' gives the impression of the doujin being one of Olddog's shitty rewrites. Essentially they made the doujin feel more shoddy and less professional. Not that it was bad, it just felt rather weird to read with the recurring use of a typically very informal acronym used almost exclusively in texting or comment panels such as this.

Base +8