Some of the translation and grammar is a bit weird... "Orene-sama"? Did you mean "Onee-sama"? "What? I won, ain't I?" Did you mean "What? I won, didn't I?"? Hoping for a version 2!" :D

Base +11, hujan86 +8, snowcake +19, Moe Zayik +15, wanna +13, Toushin +16, Dots -9, Sherlockian +8, muza +10

How unfortunate... I had hoped with v2, the terrible spelling and grammar would've been corrected. Unfortunately this wasn't the case. So here's my recommended corrections:

P07: "How could' t you be statsfied?" -> "How come you aren't satsified yet?"
P09: "There is no such thing!" -> "There's no such thing!" (Mikoto doesn't use formal tone.)
"You cry out like this, do you have feel like already?" -> "You're crying out like this, are you feeling good already?"
"And she just shocked me without conscience." -> "And she just shocked me without hestiation." (I'm not sure if 'conscience' was what you meant; 'hestiation' might be right, or not. I can't read Japanese after all.)
P10: "My victory again." -> "I win again." (At least I think that'd be more like him; the term "victory" doesn't seem right to me, IMO. It's your decision to keep "victory" or switch to "win".)
"Then it' s my victory..." -> "Then I win..." (see my comment above)
P11: "And you really want to cum before me, don' t you?" -> "Also, you really want to cum before I do, don't you?"
P13: "I cannot stop to..." -> "I can't stop it..." (I'm assuming that 'to' is a typo mistake here.)
P14: "Ah, you wake up onee-sama." -> "Ah, you woke up, Onee-sama."
"How do you sleep?" -> "How did you sleep?"
"It seemed... I had a nasty dream..." -> "It seems... that I had a nasty dream..."
"I'm not lost today!" -> "I haven't lost today!"
We just meet the first time today! -> We just met for the first time today!

Also, there's an extra space after apostrophes (i.e. "won' t" "don' t" and etc) throughout the translation, so omit those extra spaces so they read better ("won't" "don't" and etc).

That's all I can think of. Even with my recommended edits, some of dialogues still feels off somewhat, because both Touma and Mikoto aren't the type to speak formally.

Base +11, snowcake +19, White Joker +9, Zicth +6, wp2243 +7, Dots +9

yes, i agree.. what a messed up in spelling and grammar, but overall i really like the artwork.. hoping the author from this manga would create another series....

Base +9, Dots -9, muza +10

...FINAL is ESL

Base +10, taiko101 +17, Dots +9

If your English skills are poor, instead of producing bad translations, you could: 1) produce translations in your primary language and ask somebody who is fluent in both to translate - it is much easier to find translators in many languages to English than from Japanese to English or 2) post your scripts for proofreading in our Cove of Translators on the forums, where people like light here will happily help you refine your work

Base +32, Nashrakh +12, gurumao +11, wanna +13, Xakep +12, xxxxlone +9, narach +7, White Joker +9, wp2243 +7, Dots -9, cakerbaker +7, Sherlockian +8

The image at position 02 is actually the back cover. It should actually be the last image in the set. Downloaders may want to renumber their images after moving image 02 to the end.

Base +7, Dots -9, muza +10