raw: http://e-hentai.fbk.tokyo/index/g/2153045/ebf04d0002/

Chapter 1 (english translation): http://e-hentai.fbk.tokyo/index/g/2344351/e5fe55f8fd/

Base +39

011
OG: よくもまぁ
TL: N/A
ED: you skipped this and just split the TL for the next line across 2 bubbles

OG: いい…
TL: "Yey"
ED: this isn't a standalone "yay"

012
OG: 岡村、結婚してるんだ？
TL: "So are you getting married?"
ED: he's asking if she is married

OG: してないわよ！知ったかぶりで悪かったわね！
TL: "I'm not! Smart ass!"
ED: she's not calling him a smart ass

013
OG: ええと…そう… / か / な?
TL: "Hmm...ye / ...ah / ha?"
ED: "hmm yeah ha" makes no sense here

014
OG: なんで岡村バンツスーツなの？
TL: "Why are you wearing a lounge suit?."
ED: it's not a lounge suit

015
OG: んな訳ないでしょ！
TL: "No way!"
ED: she's denying his gaslighting

016
OG: なんなのよここ…っまわりで
TL: "What's...with this place."
ED: missing 2nd part of line

OG: さすがに一人で来るのはつまらんし丁度イイかなって
TL: "It would have been boring, if I came here alone. But not now"
ED: "but not now" -> he's saying his idea to come to this park was a good one since he wouldn't be alone

019
OG: お〜スーツでもわかる弾力服の上から揉む位いいでしょ
TL: "Ouh.. I can feel their caliber,even with your suit on. Fondling them with your clothes on is fine,rght[sic]"
ED: he actually describes them and doesn't say "caliber" (related to pg 32)

020
OG: ちがっ
TL: N/A

024
OG: うわ〜カリ高ってこういうのかな
TL: "Uwah, this is, how an erect dick tip feels"
ED: she isn't talking about it being erect

026
OG: きもちいいっ
TL: "Does it feel good?"
ED: wrong speaker

028
OG: カリがこりって
TL: "His dick head is engulfing me"
ED: it's not engulfing her

031
OG: 仕事帰りのＯＬの蒸れたパンスト姿に突っ込むの気持ちいい～
TL: "Fucking an OL returning from work with a wet pantyhose, feels great"
ED: her pantyhose aren't wet

032
OG: さっき喉でわからされたあのカリ高で
TL: "his dick helt, I felt with my throat,"
ED: she describes it specifically using the same thing on pg 19

etc

Base +32, that4znkid +8, hobohobo +33, Grimmy32 +11, Shellstrom +10

the end that's it he'll like what stop using it cause he got the girl he likes smh

Base +7, metonhi1 +8