1. Dude, please center-align your text. Everything's left-aligned.
2. Add a white stroke to floating text, like SFX.

Here's extra guides:

General resources: https://ouo.io/UB6WWr
Typesetting: https://gplinks.co/yk4JJmHJ
Redrawing: https://ouo.io/bf5TqW
Basic cleaning: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PANrCwHy630

edit: tagging based on DaxterSpeed's comments. They hit the quota.

Last edited on 19 May 2022, 20:30.

Base +16, sssssiggi +6, eaglef2 +6, cynamonbunz +37

Lot's of poor grammar in this, sadly. I'll go over what I came across before I gave up on trying to read the story. More examples would probably be needed to confirm the tag, but damn.
# Obvious grammar issues:
Page 5:
"I haven't said it for the rest of my life!" could be "I haven't said its for the rest of my life!", but really should be something like "I didn't say I would do it for the rest of my life!"

Page 6:
"I was happy to have a child in my neighbour hood of the same age range" should be "in the same age range" (also when splitting words across lines, like neighbourhood, a dash is recommended, like neighbour- hood).
"Kyoya is so weak" -> "was so weak", this takes place in the past.
"He get sick as soon as we go out to play" -> "He would get sick", again past tense

Page 10:
"Slamming people's nerves". -> "Getting on people's nerves."
"After all it keeps remind me to his crying face." -> "After all it keeps reminding me of his crying face."

Page 15:
"Man's ulterior motive is undeniable very problem", could be either "This man's ulterior motives are undeniably bad." or something like "Men's ulterior motives are undeniably very problematic."
"Every day you return such late-night" -> "Every night you return so late." or perhaps "Every day you come home so late at night."

Page 16:
"My senior aren't like that." -> Either "My seniors aren't like that." or "My senior isn't like that.", but I suspect "My senpai isn't like that." is what the original story intended.
"Besides, I can manage myself if there's something happened." -> "Besides, I can manage myself if something were to happen."
"Shortly, the project will be stopping soon." -> "This project will be finished soon." or "We'll be finished with the project at work soon." depending on how much context is really needed.

# Complete nonsense sentences:
Page 5:
- "It it likely to die? Suddenly I'm approaching such a line, so if you get impatient, it's this."
- "I was hungry and almost dead."
This entire exchange is difficult to read. I assume it's meant to be something along the lines of
- "Were you really about to die? If I suddenly get a message like that..." (I'm not sure at all what the original story said here, since the translation makes no sense)
- "I was so hungry I felt like I was dying."

Page 7:
- "It was a usual time for me to carry him home every time"
Very difficult to understand what the original line was. Perhaps "It wasn't uncommon for me to carry him home."?

Base +10